In 2019, I made a big life change and didn’t foresee all of the anxieties and insecurities that would come with deciding to make this change. I didn’t notice it much but every now and then I would have this FLIGHT response to normal things – conversations, singing, answering the door, etc. I found myself judging every little thing I said or did so harshly that I was starting to have constant anxiety about putting myself out there at all.
A good friend asked if I would sing at an event and I said yes. I didn’t bat an eye, this is something that I do ALL OF THE TIME. For years on big stages, in auditions, in concerts, etc. I rehearsed with the accompanist and felt super confident that it would be easy and go well. On the day of the performance, I walked up confidently and started to sing. It was going well and I got to the key change section and somehow I didn’t make the key change and had to stop and get back on quickly. I was a mess inside and nearly blacked out for the rest of the song. It was probably a 2-second blip, but to me, the entire thing was ruined. What went wrong? How did I not hear it? I had rehearsed plenty, the song was fairly easy and I was a professional (side note: holding myself to this standard was part of the problem).
I left immediately and sat in shock after. And then I completely melted down. Tears, sadness, and despair swept over me. I was completely dumbfounded, felt humiliated, and thought I ruined the event. I was supposed to be the professional…how could I make such a dumb mistake? Well, after talking through it I realized I had built-in so much around the idea that I needed to be seen as nearly perfect to be considered a professional — someone who had been on Broadway. I had truly replaced my self worth with the worry of what others thought of me. I had not had these feelings for many years so it was surprising to me that they had crept in without me really being cognitive of it.
I got to work and started back with some daily affirmation work along with some other personal work. It was hard at first to say something and not believe it. But, I did it and started to feel the shift happen. Months later I had a random blue day and because I had my affirmation arsenal built-in I immediately started reciting to myself all the positive reinforcement and kind things I could say. It took years for me to understand the power of self-talk. My mom would always say to treat me as if I were my own best friend. I would NEVER say some of the things I say to myself to anyone else, let alone my best friend.
Does it feel weird? (Sometimes, yes). Is it powerful? YES. So, what are some good examples of daily affirmations?
Download your FREE Affirmations printable and post it somewhere you will see it daily.
I hope you will give this a try because I have seen the power of this in my own life and I am at peace more with myself when I tell myself the truth, send myself love and truly care for me. Pick one or two and say it daily. Change them as you need. But, be kind to you because you should always be your own best friend first.